FMySCI - because spinal cord injury sucks. » Loss of Muscle Function

12-09-09(4:46:12)

Anonymous — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 12:53:56 +0000

I hate transfering in and out of the car… it so routine but takes forever! Wish I could walk again, it sucks rolling around. FMySCI.

03-08-09(5:20:33)

Anonymous — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 11:58:08 +0000

I hate that my balance sucks and I do a great weeble impression. I hate the effort it takes to get back into my chair when I fall out. I hate the humiliation. I hate the pain, the feeling of a thousand electric shocks just as I am about to drop off to sleep. I hate that I haven’t had a good nights sleep for over 2 years. I hate that I can’t be spontaneous, everything I do must planned. I hate forward planning. I hate how much disability costs. I hate the pitying looks I get from people, the stares, the questions. I hate that I can no longer do the job I loved. I hate my bladder & my bowels, the time and effort spent on making sure they behave. I hate the frustration, that I still burst into tears over “stupid” things. FMySCI.

30-07-09(16:54:16)

Anonymous — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 13:30:50 +0000

I am sick of sticking my finger up my booty hole. I am 19 years old and I have to freaking cath every 3 hours now because its 110 degrees in seattle (seriously) so i have to drink more water. My mom (who is a nurse) keeps telling me its the weather why i cant poop (cuz since my injury, i can poop on my own 95 percent of the time) but its cuz she is cut down on my stool softners and my laxitives because shes worried about me getting addicted to them. FMySCI!!!!!! GRRRR

24-07-09(2:23:28)

Anonymous — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 13:30:37 +0000

I think today I was getting to the beginning of depression again… I will fight this. I will not let it crush me like before. I am strong enough to fight it and everyone one of you are strong enough too.

I can go months feeling fine and then just one random thing will trigger that sadness, the times when you wake up in the morning and realize “Damn, I still can’t walk”.

08-07-09(9:23:25)

Anonymous — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 14:13:35 +0000

I hate that I cant walk… plain and simple! I’m sooo tired of it, I wont ever get used to it! FMySCI.

06-06-09(18:24:59)

Anonymous — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 23:47:08 +0000

My boyfriend has been great. Most of the girls I knew in rehab didn’t have guys who stuck by them. But every time he holds my hand, and I can’t feel it, or squeeze back, or put my arms around him, I want to die a little. I keep wondering if it’s fair to let him stay with me. FMySCI.

05-06-09(21:08:31)

Anonymous — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 05:23:16 +0000

10 years of piano lessons: thousands of dollars.
New piano bought less than a year ago: $6,500.
Breaking my neck at C4, and knowing I’ll never be able to do the thing I loved most again: priceless.

FMySCI.

01-06-09(21:06:04)

Anonymous — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 03:02:11 +0000

I hate not being able to hike and experience nature to its fullest. A powerchair is not gonna cut it. I want to rock climb, hike, swim, dive, go white water rafting, camp, paddle-boating, all this without worrying when and where to pee and poop. I wish i had more function… i hate being dependent. I hate the atrophy. F this!!! F limited opportunities. FMySCI.

01-06-09(15:16:04)

Anonymous — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 19:18:52 +0000

Microsoft just introduced Project Natal at E3. As a high quad, I won’t be able to take full advantage of it or future iterations. FMySCI.

31-05-09(23:43:57)

Anonymous — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 10:11:50 +0000

Stomach flu and SCI…diapers at the doctor’s office. Trash sack under my butt. Nearly drowning because I lack the abs to fully vomit. Get dehydrated, weak, lose balance, biff that transfer to the toilet. I love the smell of diarrhea hitting the floor right before I do, in the morning! FMySCI.